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Changework or Coaching?
I hadn't realised that I had been exploring what Coaching really can mean in practice, until the other day. Like many of you, I had experienced the work of Bill O'Hanlon and Steve Gilligan in their approaches to Solution Focussed Therapy. John McWhirter treated us to his thinking in his Coaching DANCE workshop. James and Penny, in their November workshop also brilliantly demonstrated the wholesomeness of attending to the outcome not the problem. And the trainers on our trainer training programme, NLP & Developing Potential, explored a range of coaching models with live case studies. Yet, for me Coaching was merely an extension of my existing passion that is NLP. Until I was asked to be accountable for the distinction I was seeking between changework and coaching. And as ever, thoughts escalate and new patterns form. So here goes. Many people think that NLP and Coaching is a marriage made in heaven. Those within the NLP community would argue that the skills inherent within the NLP repertoire are essential fodder for the Coaching practitioner. Who could resist the lure of being able to discover how to detect the underlying structure behind the client's behaviour; notice language patterns, respond effectively and gather information efficiently; develop extensive means of establishing rapport with even the most hesitant client; travel from one viewpoint to another perspective effortlessly; and above all manage your own state regardless of the circumstances. In fact how could you call yourself a professional Coach if you haven't perfected these skills? And there is a lot of truth in that. However that may be fine if the learning journey has been from Coach to NLP practitioner. It is not so accurate the other way round. The presupposition "No-one's broke. No-one needs fixing" supports the presupposition "We have all the resources we need." This is fine in itself and it forms the bedrock of NLP practice. However the techniques, interventions and reframes offered within the NLP portfolio are geared towards fixing. NLP trainings are famous for the change potential they offer learners, whilst still remaining a training as opposed to therapy experience. More often learners are asked to think of something that doesn't serve them, a habit they want rid of, a relationship they want improved, than invited to think of something they want more of. Some could say that we pay lip service to the 'non-one's broke' line. In fact as a body, we take pride in the speed of this fixing and the lack of attendant fuss in the process. Traditionally, NLP's focus of attention is primarily past referenced and problem based, filtering for the limitations with the client's system, and applying measures to reduce or remove these limitations all together. And we achieve great results. However this ingrained response directly opposes the future-referenced solution-focussed message of the Coach. When NLPers approach Coaching as a practice, there is a strong tendency to fall into the trap of believing that improved performance only results from removal or alteration of previous behaviour. NLPers are lazily seduced by the addictive knee jerk of "I/we/you can sort that." With these filters, we delete two very vital areas. We delete the very pragmatic question of "What now, now that you/I/we have got me sorted?" And we also delete that component within the story of when the client is doing fine. As NLPers, we are not predisposed to being Coaches. Coaching is about identifying the desired performance, and developing it further. It is about enabling the client to gain deepened and developed reference experiences of what they can already do excellently. As John McWhirter demonstrated, it is about the client discovering the real edges of his or her performance, which are usually way beyond what they currently thought. It is about taking the performance outside the current limitations and being comfortable about being uncomfortable. It is not about remodelling. It is about embellishing. And it truly does empower the individual, with no redress to keyhole surgery, no matter how elegant. How often do we hear someone say "I was doing fine until…" "I used to be able to …" "It's easy with them, it's another matter with …". "It doesn't happen when…" Clients know they need help because they know the difference between the effectiveness of what is happening now, compared to what has happened before. Clients already have a reference experience of what they want. I have a client who has been seeing me maybe three or four times a year, initially to explore some major issues, and then to address situations as they happened within her relationship and with work. She is very practical and self determining. We have done some fabulous work and the then and now comparisons are delight to behold. Last week she asked for an immediate appointment if possible. On arrival, she began to unfold a scenario which touched again on some deep patterns, which were now feeling like old ground. I was surprised, and I have to say a bit disappointed. I thought these issues had been 'sorted'. "'You and me both!' I can hear her cry." I had a choice. We could go back and we could delve again with the changework toolbox - at the risk of breeding addiction. Or I could latch onto the "I was fine until …." With the "do something different" whispering in my ear, and John McWhirter's tremendous model of Performance, Management, Direction and Supervision* presenting itself as a gift from my unconscious, we began to develop that performance of "I was fine." We played around in the space created by that model and I have to tell you that the outcome astonished me. The new information that she discovered really dislodged some fundamental thinking. At no point did we go into a problem mindset. Everything originated from what she could do, and she knew she could do. Of course time will tell and I'll keep you posted. What I now realise is that I am very clear about the distinctions between the two processes of changework and coaching. I am delighted that at last I have significantly increased my flexibility by having both wired into my responses. There will be times when it would be entirely inappropriate to offer changework techniques with a client. For example the relationship doesn't and wouldn't support that intimacy; it was contrary to the established contract; the circumstances and situation wouldn't support the process; and most importantly, the presenting outcome doesn't merit that invasive approach. Much as I love the artistry and science embraced within the delights of my NLP practices, and bask in the beauty of discovery that our beloved changework techniques can offer, I recognise that coaching has an equally important and rewarding purpose. Both approaches are about discovery and about change. As John McWhirter has said on several occasions, and I am only now beginning to appreciate: Changework is about remedial fixing. Coaching is about generative growing.
Fran Burgess
* The January Exercise of the Month has a potted version of the process which evolved. click here |
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